Among the many issues the Church faces today, none is more important than how the Church ministers to men and women with sexual and relational brokenness. The clarity of Romans 12:2 gives every Christian, without exception, two choices – either conform to the increasingly sexually broken world, or be agents of transformation.

For far too many, the cause and effect of the so called ‘sexual revolution,’ which promoted and promised ‘freedom,’ in reality birthed loneliness, unstable relationships, the abuse of children and the on-going rapid transmission of disease.

Today, there are many men and women needing ministry with regard to sexual and relational brokenness who are already within Church. Sadly, the Church continues to struggle greatly in extending ministry to the sexually broken, whether heterosexual or homosexual. A major change is long overdue.

Frankly, there is no doubt in my mind that men and women who have experienced freedom from same-sex attraction and even those still in the recovery and transformation process have much to teach the Church about ministry to the sexually broken. However, their powerful witness is far too often silenced by the Church. Consequently, we are dismissing and losing a considerable treasure in our own ranks.

In reality, the number of men and women struggling with and combating the long list of heterosexual sexual addictions far out number those combating unwanted same-sex attraction. The number of heterosexuals in our society which engage in sexual promiscuity, living together before marriage, and divorce is huge and cannot be dismissed or ignored.

I find it ironic as well as tragic that despite the undeniable evidence with regard to the need for ministry to the sexually broken in Church, there are those that want to kill the messenger. Today, former homosexuals are frequently attacked from both sides on the debate over morality. Ultimately, what gets lost are those in need of ministry. There is no doubt that the debate over the morality of homosexual practice will continue which will continue to fuel the reality that sexual brokenness exists which points to the truth that the need for ministry is needed and will always exist.

Now, here is where I am confident I will definitely ruffle some feathers. A church, any church that cannot or is unwilling to meet the great need that exists in the Church today with regard to those struggling with sexual brokenness, heterosexual or homosexual, will find itself sexually dysfunctional. Dysfunctional because it places itself in a position of not being able to offer the basic functions of upholding morality and extending ministry to the sexually broken.

Silence is undeniably an earmark of a dysfunctional family because the real problems are never discussed and resolved. I submit, if we, The Church, will decide and follow through by breaking the bonds of secrecy which frequently darken and downplay the reality of sexual brokenness in our own ranks, “we” will find healing.

Not long ago, I was talking with a friend and ministry colleague when she offered, “We are definitely in need of new strategies.” The statement pushed all my buttons. While I agreed, I also thought, “Where do we start?”

How about using reason and logic, not just emotion, to understand what we, The Church, are truly facing?

It seems to me that the much-needed healing of sexual brokenness in our own ranks may just spark the renewal and restoration needed within The Church, thereby enabling the upholding of truth and the extension of compassionate competent ministry.

The ministry of hope, truth, healing and transformation comes from Romans 12:2, where the Apostle Paul calls on all Christians (no exceptions) to transform their lives. The Church must be a welcoming place for those struggling with sexual brokenness.

Jesus told the parable of the Prodigal Son in Luke 15:11-32. If you recall the son went away from his family and ended up in a damaging lifestyle. Ultimately, he comes to his senses, repents and returns home. You hopefully recall that he was met by his loving and forgiving father. But his older brother objected to his welcome home.

This is the choice that stands before many of us today. Will we be the loving father or the condemning brother?

Today, many that are in the process of transformation and recovering from their sexual brokenness, want to be in church, indeed, many are already in our churches. Will we welcome and offer them ministry?

While we, in and of ourselves cannot promise healing to any person, even though we are convinced that God can and does heal many, we must continue to see the Body of Christ as the primary agent for any and all transformation. The ministry of hope, healing, wholeness and transformation takes place in the Body of Christ, The Church.

It is imperative the Body of Christ stand against current trends in today’s society that have and continue to distort human sexuality as God intended and created it.

In the end, we will be successful by extending a ministry solution. We are individually and collectively part of God’s plan by offering the ministry of transformation and humbly realizing God has called us to partner with Him in His plan.

What a privilege. What an honor. What a responsibility.

“…where the Spirit of the Lord is, there is liberty.” (2 Corinthians 3:17)

From All of Us at His Way Out Ministries…
To each of you who continually bless us by your encouragement, ministry participation, monthly financial support, offerings, and prayers…we remain truly grateful. His Way Out Ministries is proclaiming to, educating and impacting the world with the biblical truth that freedom from homosexuality is possible when Jesus Christ is Lord of your life! (1 Corinthians 6:9-11)

Pastor Phillip Lee
Executive Director
His Way Out Ministries

His Way Out has been faithfully ministering to men and women seeking a way out of sexually broken lifestyles since 1994. We could not do it without the support of Christians like you. Every dollar that you give to His Way Out Ministries helps to further this vital ministry. Won’t you take a minute to prayerfully consider a monthly donation to His Way Out? Please consider making a one-time donation or set up a secure monthly PayPal contribution on our donation page at https://www.hiswayout.com/donate/. Thank you, Pastor Phillip Lee

20160726

Does failure compel you away from God, or compel you to cast yourself on His grace?

We are all on a journey of obedience and along the way we experience God’s healing hand. Sometimes our path is marked by absolute ecstasy of His presence, but sometimes it s marked by our will to obey Him in the absence of spiritual passion.

Our humility will always bear, to some degree or another, the marks of this fallen age we live in. But what exactly does that mean? Could it possibly mean that…

• the habitual liar may still slip at times?
• the homosexual struggler may still experience homosexual temptations?
• the formerly abused one may at times feel irrationally threatened in certain situations?
• the former addict may need on-going accountability in his or her area of weakness?

None of that minimizes God’s power. It simply places that person into a process, a journey of becoming whole – a process that will never end until we see Jesus in heaven. A Christian’s goal is always Jesus Christ and in turn Christ-likeness. Without question, the goal of sanctification is to be conformed into the image of Jesus Christ and not to be a close-ended definition of wholeness.

Please find comfort in knowing that sanctification and becoming whole in Jesus is a process. And, because it is a process, it doesn’t happen over night.

Growing whole takes time – a lifetime in fact.

“You can do all things through Him who gives you strength.” (Philippians 4:13)

Homosexuality and the Authority of Scripture

Where faithful followers of Christ Jesus must part company with those that promote pro-gay theology is in the misguided conclusions they have drawn. The Holy Scriptures cannot be rewritten, as they have, to accommodate a sin simply because some believe it to be inborn, unchangeable, or common.

Jesus Himself warned that a prominent sign of the days before His coming would be an increase in deception. (Matthew 24:4)

Pastor Phillip Lee
Executive Director
His Way Out Ministries

His Way Out has been faithfully ministering to men and women seeking a way out of sexually broken lifestyles since 1994. We could not do it without the support of Christians like you. Every dollar that you give to His Way Out Ministries helps to further this vital ministry. Won’t you take a minute to prayerfully consider a monthly donation to His Way Out? Please consider making a one-time donation or set up a secure monthly PayPal contribution on our donation page at https://www.hiswayout.com/donate/. Thank you, Pastor Phillip Lee

20160529

In essence, we have become a culture who now worships itself as God, not only in mind and body, but also in destiny and purpose. We sanction this ‘religion’ through feeling and experience while pronouncing all truth to be relative. How incredibly convenient is that?

We are a people driven, controlled and consumed by our feelings.

Very often, truth becomes established according to our experiences. Our self-obsession and rebellion against the rule of God has blinded us.

Christians are commanded to “come out from among these rebellious people.” (2 Corinthians 6:17-18) Believe it or not, we do not have to respond to every feeling or emotion that comes along. God gave us a mind and the inner witness of the Holy Spirit to guide us into all truth. Experience must always be subservient to the principles outlined in God’s Word.

I have been and continue to be very fortunate and blessed in meeting men and women who have emerged from the brokenness of same-sex attraction. When I view and consider the personal difficulties they have had to face, the incredible courage they have displayed not only in facing many difficulties but also in confronting a culture that uses every opportunity to deny the validity of their values, goals, and experiences, I stand back in awe. It is these men and women, former homosexuals and those still struggling, who present a model of everything good and possible.

Frankly, the battle that rages is not over a person’s sexuality, but rather over which spirit will claim that person’s allegiance. The cultural and political battle over homosexuality and related issues has become in many respects the defining moment for our society.

The battle rages over much more than just “gay rights.” The more important aspect of this battle is not the political one; it is the one for the individual human soul.

In his book, Eros Defiled, John White writes, “We are all playing Christian club games while men and women around us are tormented by sin, too timid to bare their bosoms, too ashamed to ask our help.”

It is the response of the Church to the man or woman combating same-sex attraction that will largely determine if he or she will keep fighting. All the counseling, support groups, curriculum, etc. in the world will be in vain if he does not have a church to love him, support him, and relate to him.

We must recognize the existence of homosexually oriented believers in our churches. They exist and a tremendous need for ministry exists with them.

When we preach or teach against the evil of a lifestyle or activity, we should also be seeking alternatives to offer in place of the thing we are condemning. It doesn’t take a lot of expertise to develop ministry to those struggling with same-sex attraction. Some basic understanding of homosexuality is helpful, of course, and the many ministries, churches and professional Christian counselors affiliated with Restored Hope Network can provide an abundance of useful information.

However, a willingness to be involved in the lives of those struggling with unwanted same-sex attraction is the starting point from which solid, successful ministry to them can develop.

“Love, and the unity it attests to, is the mark Christ gave Christians to wear before the world. Only with this mark may the world know that Christians are indeed Christians and that Jesus was sent by the Father.” Francis Schaeffer

His Way Out Ministries remains dedicated to raising awareness, educating, encouraging and equipping the Body of Christ to minister transformingly to those struggling with unwanted same-sex attraction.

Pastor Phillip Lee
Executive Director
His Way Out Ministries

His Way Out has been faithfully ministering to men and women seeking a way out of sexually broken lifestyles since 1994. We could not do it without the support of Christians like you. Every dollar that you give to His Way Out Ministries helps to further this vital ministry. Won’t you take a minute to prayerfully consider a monthly donation to His Way Out? Please consider making a one-time donation or set up a secure monthly PayPal contribution on our donation page at https://www.hiswayout.com/donate/. Thank you, Pastor Phillip Lee

20160624

In a workshop for parents with children involved in homosexuality, I was asked, “How do I pray for my same-sex attracted son/daughter?”

Since the roots of same-sex attraction are complex, it would be a mistake to suppose that a one-method prayer approach would be universally successful. First and foremost, if we want to get results in prayer, we must be convinced of one basic fact: God wants to answer our prayers. In other words, expect wonderful things to happen.

Luke 18:1 says, “Men ought always to pray and not to faint.”

It is not the beauty or the eloquence of our prayer that gets God’s ear, He responds to faith. Praying in faith is merely having confidence in God’s willingness to use His power to answer your prayer. Faith causes your prayers to bring results.

For most same-sex attracted men and women, the sexual aspect is surface in comparison to the complex roots of same-sex orientation. Therefore, ordinarily, expect that changes will occur in his or her life gradually and over time. That said; do not rule out relatively instant changes.

Today, “Does the individual with same-sex attraction want to be restored?” is an important, if not paramount question. Be prepared for the life that he or she has known, the friends they have known, and the prospect of possibly losing so much to surface. Certainly, while we encourage change we should not pressure or push people into making decisions. The very first step is to help the person to know Jesus; help them to know God’s love. Allow Jesus to work from the inside out, step by step.

If the gay-identified individual does not sense a need yet for change or is possibly ambivalent about it, we need to love him or her and accept them where they are. This does not mean we accept the homosexual lifestyle, but there is a progression in time and God respects the freedom of the person’s free will and conscience.

I did not know until after about five or six years of freedom from homosexuality and well into my new life in Christ, how and for how long my mother had been praying for me. One day, my mother and I were having a frank discussion about homosexuality when all of a sudden she began to sob with a steady flow of tears streaming down her face. When I asked “Mom, what’s wrong?” she replied, “You don’t know the many, many times I prayed: ‘Devil, I don’t care what he’s been doing or even for how long he’s been doing it, in the Name of Jesus you can’t have him anymore!’” Watch out for the prayers of Mama.

As we all know, when we have sinned, we need to repent and ask God’s forgiveness. Like a heterosexual who has been sexually active for years, a sexually active homosexual will find it challenging to enter into the process of change, and he or she may lapse from time to time, but the basic will to change must be there.

Unfortunately, some men and women struggling with same-sex attraction become rigid at the very mention of healing, deliverance, or restoration because the terms imply there is something wrong with them. Many have encountered so much shaming that they just naturally react sometimes even to the best of intentions, or as they see it, yet another opportunity to put them down. I guarantee you any judgmental, righteous attitude on the part of anyone even offering to pray will instantly be sensed.

It is not unusual for some to criticize most actions that fall outside the scope of our own desires and understanding. As a result, a heterosexual man or woman never having an issue with same-sex attraction might have a tendency to feel uncomfortable with someone with a homosexual orientation, especially if they fear the homosexual might develop a sexual attraction if they became too friendly. The ironic twist, if not a general rule, is that I challenge our praying successfully with people unless we have a real love for them. Therefore, anyone spending time with or praying with the same-sex attracted individual needs to feel comfortable working with them. Unless I truly feel, “There but for the grace of God go I,” our truly being of help is in serious question.

Maybe you’ve noticed? While God does answer our prayers, He rarely answers them when and how we want. We want to see the man or woman set free from same-sex attraction now! But God’s timing is perfect and His methods are perfect. Therefore, wait on Him to work in the life of your son, daughter, co-worker, neighbor, brother, or sister in Christ. During the waiting time, strengthen your faith and trust in the Lord. He hears and He is there to help you.

Remember to see Christ as your hope, knowing “That all things work together for good to them that love God, to them that are called according to His purpose.” (Romans 8:28) As a believer, you can achieve the same results that Jesus did during His earthly ministry. Jesus said, “He that believeth on me, the works that I do shall he do also, and greater works than these shall he do; because I go unto the Father.” (John 14:12) Yes, today, greater works can be accomplished – if we cease not in our prayers.

• Intercede with God for the destruction of the stronghold of same-sex attraction to be eradicated.
• Present the person to God as one for whom Christ has died.
• Pray for God to place a wall of protection around the person.

Remember, “The weapons we fight with are not the weapons of the world. On the contrary, they have divine power to demolish strongholds.” (2 Corinthians 10:4)

“Father, Your Word is true and I believe it. Therefore, in the Name of Jesus, I believe in my heart and say with my mouth that the Word of God prevails over my loved one. Your Word says that You will pour out Your Spirit upon my offspring and Your blessing upon my descendants. I believe and say that my loved ones are wise and that they take heed to and are the fruit of godly instruction and correction. So, I commit them into Your keeping, in Jesus’ Name.”

Pastor Phillip Lee
Executive Director
His Way Out Ministries

Please consider making a donation at www.hiswayout.com/donate. Thank you, Pastor Phillip Lee