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Speaking from experience, having waded through years of healing, discipleship, study, and surrender (at times, daily), when homosexuality hit my family, as it has a multitude of others, it brought pain, indescribable pain, and misunderstanding along with it. Largely, because (way back then), no one knew anything about the behavior. Frankly, the only comment anyone offered was, “It’s wrong!” Today, just like then, “that’s not good enough and completely unacceptable.”

Some time ago, a Christian friend and mother I have known for many years wrote me and once again uttered the expression I have heard so many times during the 30 years of His Way Out Ministries, “I never thought I would be contacting you with a problem of homosexuality in my family.”

The mother was understandably shattered. Initially, while the mother did respond and react appropriately standing upon the right Scriptures, the son responded with a very interesting and revealing remark. He said, “Mom, you keep telling me how hard this is for you to hear and deal with. Don’t you realize how hard it has been for me these many, many years, being raised in a Christian home and knowing that once this got out it would kill you? Ultimately, I had to make a decision that I knew nobody would be happy with. Please consider and realize that I have my own demons to fight.”

Frankly, there is a great deal of truth in the son’s comments.

Whether we agree or not with the son’s ultimately decision or conclusion that he is gay and entitled to act upon his feelings and desires (which I certainly do not), we must admit that he was right in saying he had reached his conclusion after going through quite an intense struggle on his own. It is very important to remember within the evolvement of same-sex attraction that homosexual tendencies are discovered but the gay identity is ultimately embraced. And, there is a considerable difference between the two.

When any individual discloses their battle with same-sex attraction, their confession enables an intriguing and powerful opportunity to the family and really to anyone that becomes aware. Can I truly continue to love him for who he is and not for what he does?

As a Christ-follower, if we are becoming effective in not putting unrealistic expectations on ‘anyone,’ we are in line to accept them for who they are, not for what we wish they were.

It is God’s part to give those that struggle with same-sex attraction abhorrence for the behavior – an abhorrence that will bring them to a place of complete surrender to the sovereignty of God in their lives and a desire to change.

While there are no specific verses in the Bible telling us under what circumstances, if any, we should adopt this or that policy toward a homosexual loved one, let’s consider a few specific communications that need to be offered with the hope and endeavor of keeping the lines of communication open.

What the Bible says and why you disapprove of homosexuality every time you are with your child, friend, co-worker, etc., is not necessary state. However, do make sure the individual knows the following:

  • You understand that he/she did not ask for these feelings.
  • You appreciate their honesty and transparency in disclosing their issue with same-sex attraction.
  • Your belief regarding homosexual practice as sin is not going to change.
  • You want to protect your relationship through mutual respect and understanding.
  • While you may never agree on the subject of homosexuality, you are committed to not letting that disagreement ruin your relationship.

As faithful followers of Christ Jesus, we must never affirm homosexual practice. But we can at least affirm the fact that the individual struggling with same-sex attraction has tried to be honest with us and has taken quite a risk in telling us, knowing it is not what we wanted to hear.

How well I remember disclosing my own battle with same-sex attraction and giving my family every reason to write me off.

Frankly, there was no reason for my family to ever think I would repent and turn completely away from homosexuality. Thankfully, sometimes when God calls us to release a family member or friend through a prayer of relinquishment, that doesn’t mean He is releasing them as well.

God is saying: “Do all you can do, continue to love them, and wait.”

Indeed, dealing with the discovery that someone you love has same-sex attraction issues is a difficult stewardship, but the God who gave us this stewardship has also equipped us to handle it and maintain a Christ-like attitude.

“For whatever things were written before were written for our learning, that we through the patience and comfort of the Scriptures might have hope.” (Romans 15:4)

Pastor Phillip Lee
Executive Director
His Way Out Ministries

His Way Out has been faithfully ministering to men and women seeking a way out of sexually broken lifestyles since 1994. We could not do it without the support of Christians like you. Every dollar that you give to His Way Out Ministries helps to further this vital ministry. Won’t you take a minute to prayerfully consider a monthly donation to His Way Out? Please consider making a one-time donation or set up a secure monthly PayPal contribution on our donation page at https://www.hiswayout.com/donate/. Thank you, Pastor Phillip Lee

To date, you have based your understanding of today’s social issues on the Bible’s truth. However, mainstream culture not only sees these issues differently but calls you bigoted for rejecting views they have deemed self-evident.

So where do you “go from here and how do you remain a witness of Christ’s love to those ready to label and right you off as hateful?”

Having/holding the right positions is good.

Living them is better.

Today, anyone who believes in upholding and protecting the Lordship of Christ and the Authority of Scripture, especially its relevance to social issues, as well as offering a defense for sound doctrine will most assuredly find himself in an intense battle.

Articulating Biblical precepts can get you fired, canceled, censored, and possibly even jailed. The demand for dedicated faithful followers of Christ Jesus to be silent is growing.

However, we must never be ashamed of the gospel – and we are told to proclaim its precepts.

If the Christian community is ever to meet the challenge of the relentless pro-gay assault upon the Church and God’s Word, it is essential and imperative the Church recover its purpose and proper place by preaching and teaching the entirety of Scripture as it applies to all of life – which includes the realm of sexual ethics and morals.

Pastor Phillip Lee RL media

For faithful followers of Christ Jesus, following the teachings of Christ and being purposed to reach men and women struggling with same-gender attraction may inflict a tremendous personal challenge, if not a very high price.

However, if we are truly in love with Jesus, our willingness and obedience to go in His Name does not really cost us anything, it is a joy. But it just might cost those who do not know Him or refuse to follow Him a great deal.

Over and over again, I have found that teaching and testifying about a God that saves and delivers from the snare of homosexuality causes many people to have their plans for life upset. The world and its effects have worn away the faith of many. While it is continued to be taught and preached that God can do the impossible, do we still believe that?

When it comes to the issue of homosexuality, the Church has become fractured and viewpoints can differ from church to church, denomination to denomination, and believer to believer.

While some say, “God created some men and women homosexual; acting out sexually doesn’t matter, you are saved by faith and not works; homosexuals were created to be lost; God accepts you where you are and no change is necessary,” each and every one of these misguided false statements flies in the face of the Gospel of Jesus Christ.

I have even tragically heard it said, “the very best a homosexual can hope for is celibacy,” when it comes to change. Is it any wonder the man or woman struggling with homosexuality is often completely confused about the Christian viewpoint? Too often, the individual trying to follow and be obedient to the full Gospel of Christ encounters someone who is there to tell him he doesn’t have to change his life, just change churches. It is far easier to change churches than it is to be obedient and change your attitude and behavior.

As a Christian, I must be obedient and involved in the full purposes of God which will often cause many to be offended. However, being obedient to Jesus never brings dishonor to Him. The only thing that dishonors Him is not obeying Him.

I believe an appropriate question for the Church today regarding homosexuality and related issues is, “Am I being loyal to the notions of Jesus, or loyal to Him?”

Are we, His Church, remaining loyal to what He has clearly stated in His Word regarding homosexuality, or are we trying to find compromises with conceptions that never came from Him?

Helping a man or woman to come out of homosexuality takes a tremendous amount of effort. Frankly, it is much, much easier to say that it simply can’t be done than to embark on a journey that may last for a very long time. Tragically, many have counted the cost and ultimately made the decision that it simply wasn’t worth the effort. However, that never has, nor will it ever minimize God’s power or His sovereignty.

Yes, God is more than able to change our life, but He requires our obedience and participation. Unfortunately, we live in a world today that seeks, if not demands, a simple and natural explanation for just about everything. Anytime we look to the world for definitive answers, we place ourselves on shifting sand.

When a person who was once controlled by his sin is now free from that sin and engaged in a new kind of life pattern, hasn’t change occurred?

Oswald Chambers states in My Utmost for His Highest, “A man is a slave for obeying unless behind his obedience there is recognition of a holy God.” I find it remarkable that God never insists on our obedience, but when we truly know Him, we want to instantly obey Him and live according to His perfect will from sunup to sundown.

Indeed, obedience is much better than sacrifice. However, the wonderful hymn, “I Surrender All,” does not seem to be at the top of the charts today. Today, like never before, God desires that all men and women surrender their sexuality to Him. When anyone is obedient and fully surrenders their life to Him, which includes their sexuality, life will take on new meaning, purpose and a relationship with God, that many never thought possible, will become a reality. Why? Because God always blesses obedience.

“I tell you the truth unless a kernel of wheat falls to the ground and dies, it remains only a single seed. But if it dies, it produces many seeds. The man who loves his life will lose it, while the man who hates his life in this world will keep it for eternal life.” (John 12:24-25 NIV)

Today, there remains a remnant being used of God to bring repentance and restoration to men and women with unwanted same-sex attraction. Personally, I continue to hope and pray their example will bring repentance and restoration to the Church of Jesus Christ.

Holiness, godliness, and spiritual discipline should be, must be the distinctive marks of the true Church. Jesus prayed that His people be kept in truth: “Sanctify them by Your truth. Your word is truth.” (John 17:17)

Compromising God’s Word, His Truth, or withholding His Truth only leads to greater unity with the world and not His Church.

As Christians, may we never forget that while our obedience to the Great Commission may cost us personally, the good news of spiritual deliverance through Jesus Christ remains an important and vital resource that Christians must share.

On God’s truth is where a Christian, the Church must stand.

Pastor Phillip Lee
Executive Director
His Way Out Ministries

His Way Out has been faithfully ministering to men and women seeking a way out of sexually broken lifestyles since 1994. We could not do it without the support of Christians like you. Every dollar that you give to His Way Out Ministries helps to further this vital ministry. Won’t you take a minute to prayerfully consider a monthly donation to His Way Out? Please consider making a one-time donation or set up a secure monthly PayPal contribution on our donation page at https://www.hiswayout.com/donate/. Thank you, Pastor Phillip Lee

If you believe in an all-powerful God, the most obvious answer to this question is “Yes!”

While some say – God created some men and women homosexual; acting out sexually doesn’t matter, you are saved by faith and not works; homosexuals were created to be lost; God accepts you where you are and no change is necessary – each an every one of these misguided false statements flies in the face of the Gospel of Jesus Christ. I have even tragically heard it said “the very best a homosexual can hope for is celibacy” when it comes to change.

Too often, the individual trying to follow and be obedient to the full Gospel of Christ encounters someone who is there to tell him he doesn’t have to change his life, just change churches. It’s far easier to change churches than it is to be obedient and change your attitude and behavior.

Often, caught in the middle of the emotional conflict regarding “change” is the person who struggles with unwanted same-sex attraction. To him, (and I use the pronoun generically for both men and women) the issue of change is more than just an issue of emotional debate. It strikes at the very core of his being – either bringing hope or despair.

The Oxford American Dictionary defines change as to make or become different; to pass from one form or phase into another. Certainly, for any individual the greatest change is to become a Christian and know that your destination has been changed from hell to heaven; to become born-again.

The question, “can homosexuals really change?” is a fair and monumentally important question. Based upon the ministry experience of His Way Out Ministries, each person seeking to overcome same-sex attraction is different. The men and women that have exited homosexuality span a wide variety of ages, personalities, occupations, nationalities, and church denominations. Some of these men and women have been free from homosexual involvement for ten or twenty years. They are not just suppressing their homosexual or lesbian longings. There has been a true resolution of this issue in their lives.

Having been around the phenomenon of change for quite some time, I am convinced that much of the conflict regarding same-sex attraction and change comes from a misunderstanding of the meaning of change. Redemptive changes occur in all of us as human beings and are precipitated by many things – God’s timing, our desires, our commitment to God and the healing, restoration process, our past involvement in sinful behavior, and what it was that pushed us toward the particular sin in the first place. With same-sex attraction it is no different. The contributing factors to a person having an issue with same-sex attraction are numerous and complex. However, that does not minimize God’s power and sovereignty, nor does it change the undeniable biblical evidence that God can change the life of a person involved in homosexuality. Homosexuals have been experiencing change since the Bible was written. (1 Corinthians 6:9-11)

Yes, change occurs within a process; a process that takes time. Spiritual growth is a lifelong process. Working through character faults and past hurts, immaturities and insecurities is a long process for everyone, not just the recovering same-sex attracted individual. What are some of the specifics within the process? What are some of the battles each man and woman will undoubtedly face?

There must be an admittance I need to change. It’s pretty tough to admit I need to change, especially if I can recall having same-gender desires for as long as I can remember, and they feel natural. To admit I need to change is to say there is something wrong with the way I am or the way that I live. That’s a pretty tough pill to swallow because it hurts our ego. However, admitting that I need help is a courageous first step. Change is a cooperative venture between God and us through the power of the Holy Spirit.

Leaving homosexuality is something like submitting to major spiritual surgery. Identity becomes in absolute turmoil. That should not be so surprising since anytime we make a change in our behavior, it is usually because the pain involved in that behavior outweighs the pleasure. Maybe you’ve noticed? While we know intellectually, we must make a change, our feelings do not necessarily follow – men and women that say good-bye to homosexuality or lesbianism, experience grief, disorientation, and confusion. This is because when we lose something or someone important, the loss registers deep within our being. Not surprising, the loss impacts our life, and we grieve. For men and women coming out of homosexuality the loss can be multifaceted: an identity, possibly a partner, a secure living situation, etc. The change is often dramatic and the grief, disorientation and sometimes confusion that often follows, can be devastating.

Exposing the roots and opening old wounds can be costly. Why study or explore the root(s) of any form of brokenness? In terms of same-sex attraction, understanding homosexuality development points the way to true resolution. The changing of any behavior necessitates retracing the steps that have brought us to this point. Looking at family dynamics, painful childhood experiences, physical or sexual abuse, peer pressure, temperament and interests, societal influences, all can play a part in shaping a person’s sexual orientation. If I desire to understand how I arrived at this point, I must delve into my life, examining the path I have taken and what might have robbed me of a healthy heterosexual identity. Identifying painful situations and working through them is part of the process.

Being totally committed to the will of God. Why do some make it out of homosexuality while others don’t? One common denominator among those men and women that have experienced significant change involves the issue of surrender and control in their lives. Nothing short of total commitment to the will of God (despite feelings, emotions, hormones, temptations, etc.) will hold the same-sex attracted individual to the discipline needed for the change process. Ultimately, the Lordship of Christ and the Authority of Scripture must prevail in all circumstances and take priority regardless of what I think or feel. Sexual sin is very insidious. At its core, it is a need to be loved – to be held and treasured. But like many of Satan’s tricks, sex becomes a cheap substitute – the means to an end. Commitment to God’s will necessitates death – a death to self – a death to “what I want when I want it” and giving over to what God wants for me. It is putting God on the throne of my life instead of self.

Indeed, there is a cost to “change.” This is often, as the saying goes, “where we separate the men from the boys.” Ultimately, a person’s freedom or deliverance from homosexuality comes from a Person, rather than a method. Ironically, the interesting thing about the change process is that change itself is not the goal. Change of any type or to any degree will only occur when that person pursues a far more compelling goal and focus. Freedom, change, healing, restoration only occurs when we look upward to Jesus and are purposed to enter more deeply into fellowship with Him. As our Creator, God is the only one who knows exactly how to restore us and bring about change.

While it continues to be taught and preached God can do the impossible, do we still believe that? When it comes to the issue of same-sex attraction, the Church has become fractured and viewpoints can differ from church to church, denomination to denomination, believer to believer.

As true faithful followers of Christ Jesus, may we never forget that while our obedience to the Great Commission may cost us personally, the good news of spiritual deliverance through Jesus Christ remains an important and vital resource that all faithful followers of Christ Jesus must share.

If we are truly in love with Jesus, our willingness and obedience to go in His Name does not really cost us anything, it is a joy. But it just might cost those who do not know Him or refuse to follow Him a great deal.

“I tell you the truth…unless a kernel of wheat falls to the ground and dies, it remains only a single seed. But if it dies, it produces many seeds. The man who loves his life will lose it, while the man who hates his life in this world will keep it for eternal life.” (John 12:24-25 NIV)

Finally, when an individual who was once controlled by his sin is now free from that sin and engaged in a new kind of life pattern, hasn’t change occurred?

Oswald Chambers states in My Utmost for His Highest, “A man is a slave for obeying unless behind his obedience there is recognition of a holy God.” I find it remarkable that God never insists on our obedience, but when we truly know Him, we want to instantly obey Him and live according to His perfect will from sunup to sundown.

Pastor Phillip Lee
Executive Director
His Way Out Ministries

His Way Out has been faithfully ministering to men and women seeking a way out of sexually broken lifestyles since 1994. We could not do it without the support of Christians like you. Every dollar that you give to His Way Out Ministries helps to further this vital ministry. Won’t you take a minute to prayerfully consider a monthly donation to His Way Out? Please consider making a one-time donation or set up a secure monthly PayPal contribution on our donation page at https://www.hiswayout.com/donate/. Thank you, Pastor Phillip Lee

Is there any doubt truth, God’s absolute truth, has both the power to agitate and to silence? The pain, frustration and anguish many are suffering today clearly says something is wrong.

That said, truth has the power to turn things around and make things right.

God’s Word is “living and powerful, and sharper than any two-edged sword” (Hebrews 4:12), and it will not return void (Isaiah 55:11).

We still have every reason to trust in the power of God’s Word to redeem, deliver and even change the course of our present culture.

Break your silence and speak the Word of God.

Make no mistake, the silent mode many have adopted regarding matters of gender, sexuality, and the holy boundary lines regarding sexual expression we are to live within and which have been well defined by God in His Word, has and continues to constitute aiding and abetting the enemy of our soul.

Is there nothing wrong with sex as long as it is consensual? And if there is something wrong, what is it? Does it really come down to a matter of personal taste, private sentiment, and personal choice? Have we become a nation, a world that gains a sense of purpose and meaning primarily from our sexual desires and behavior?

Pastor Phillip Lee

Today, with many rejecting the Authority of Scripture in matters of faith, practice, and God’s holy boundary lines with regard to sexual expression, clearly what we are witnessing is – without the spiritual, sexuality will always rule and reign supreme.

On every hand, you find those “who call evil good and good evil, who put darkness for light and light for darkness.” (Isaiah 5:20)

With all sorts of opinions consuming the airwaves, media, and the Internet, it appears everything is now up for question, debate, and compromise, sexual expression in particular.

The moral status of America cannot be determined on the basis of population figures. There is no such thing as statistical morality. America’s blind, amoral pursuit of pleasure at any price, and in any form, has indeed perpetuated the social and dark spiritual dynamics that have birthed and inflamed the various forms of sexual perversion.

Does this not constitute “aiding and abetting the enemy?”

While there are those still attempting to make The Bible and Christianity socially and culturally relevant by rewriting and redefining biblical standards, I find tremendous comfort and strength in knowing God’s Word remains steadfast from generation to generation. Therefore, it remains crucial that each and every true faithful follower of Christ Jesus understand and embrace “thus saith the Lord” when it comes to God’s divine intent for human sexuality and a host of other issues of our time.

Ultimately, God is not and will not be mocked, and there is no way anyone can legitimately rewrite or circumvent what God prohibits. Anyone choosing to practice any behavior (in any form or to any degree) that God has clearly defined as sin, cannot glorify God and will eventually downward spiral.

But the good news is “if we confess our sins, He is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness,” (1 John 1:8) no matter how sinister, dark, rebellious or disobedient our actions or heart may be.

How well I remember my first reading of 1 Corinthians 6:9-11 “Do you not know that the unrighteous will not inherit the Kingdom of God? Do not be deceived. Neither fornicators, nor idolaters, nor adulterers, nor homosexuals, nor sodomites, nor thieves, nor covetous, nor drunkards, nor revilers, nor extortioners will inherit the Kingdom of God. And such were some of you. But you were washed, but you were sanctified, but you were justified in the Name of the Lord Jesus and by the Spirit of our God.”

What hope and comfort this passage gave me. Clearly, according to God, anyone can be an overcomer and cleansed by the blood of Jesus. The Lord Jesus has not changed, nor will He ever alter His Word to accommodate man’s sinful desires, choices, and behaviors.

The reality of an across-the-board crisis of sexual and relational brokenness in America clearly points to an increasing inability, as a society, to make healthy and moral distinctions. Even those who place a high premium on tolerance are obligated to recognize that matters of various sexual lifestyles now threaten the very values and institutions on which a solid and vital society is built and sustained.

I believe we all would do well to ponder the words of Frederick Douglas…

“It is easier to build strong children than to repair broken men.”

What matters morally should and must be determined on the basis of our best understanding of what constitutes human well-being. Today, more than ever, responsible American citizens who truly care for the greater social good of America are obligated to impose, if not place under the microscope, a moral gaze on their sexual behavior.

Unfortunately, not every American is willing or responsive enough to such an obligation. What’s more, they do not want anyone to hold them responsible. Those who have the self-respect to recognize that a person is not reducible to his or her desires or behavior truly exhibit a concern for social justice, personal responsibility, and a true love for this nation which seeks nothing higher than the welfare of people.

When a person’s actions, no matter how sincere, endanger the well-being of society, criticism and confrontation are both appropriate and necessary. Irresponsible sexual behavior is one of our nation’s most destructive realities.

How is it that in choosing to dismiss and disregard a moral compass, we are shocked by the state of our culture? Even so, shocked at what has happened and continues to spread in the Church?

Speaking as someone that was trapped for many years in a behavior and lifestyle, thinking there was no way out, I completely understand how anyone might have difficulty in believing in and receiving God’s forgiveness and restoration.

“But Jesus Christ is the same yesterday, today and forever.” (Hebrews 13:8) God remains rich in mercy and remains willing to deliver anyone. “He is forever our great Sin-bearer and the God who forgives.” (Psalm 99:8).

Jesus Christ is the alternative. He addresses the problem – man limited to self – and provides the way through which we can find fulfillment in God and His people. By releasing us from the dictates of the past, Jesus frees us to live as new creatures.

God’s grace is sufficient because His strength is made perfect in our weakness. He provides a new identity, the center out of which a true sense of well-being can be achieved and enjoyed. As we draw close to Him, we are enabled to reflect His image in our humanity more and more fully.

America is in need of huge and immediate change. I believe the Church should be out front by showing the way to bring it about. If things continue in this wonderful nation as they have, America and the Church will remain adrift without a moral compass.

There was a time when the Church set societal standards. We cannot and we must not apologize for moral and ethical “holy boundary lines” for living. All faithful followers of Christ Jesus are called to a higher standard.

It is absolutely essential we return to pinning our faith to, and subject “all” our thinking to and doing to, what we read in the Bible. The 138th Psalm says, “I will praise your name for your loving kindness and your truth, for you have magnified your word above your name.”

Obviously, God thinks highly of His name – but He has magnified His Word even above His name – and so should we all.

Pastor Phillip Lee
Executive Director
His Way Out Ministries

His Way Out has been faithfully ministering to men and women seeking a way out of sexually broken lifestyles since 1994. We could not do it without the support of Christians like you. Every dollar that you give to His Way Out Ministries helps to further this vital ministry. Won’t you take a minute to prayerfully consider a monthly donation to His Way Out? Please consider making a one-time donation or set up a secure monthly PayPal contribution on our donation page at https://www.hiswayout.com/donate/. Thank you, Pastor Phillip Lee

When prominent church leaders allow secular guidance to trump biblical teaching and truth the church begins to look and sound like the world having revised biblical truth, especially as it relates to homosexuality.

It is only when the Church holds to Truth, God’s absolute Truth, the Church has any hope of influencing culture.

  • We are created beings, created with a specific intent (Genesis 1:26-2:23).
  • God’s divine intent for human sexuality is fulfilled within the covenant of a monogamous and heterosexual union (Matthew 19:4-6).
  • We are a fallen race, and the Fall has marred every part of our experience, including our sexual preference (Romans 5:12-19).
  • The Apostle Paul defines homosexual practice as a symptom of fallen humanity, describing it as unnatural and unseemly (Romans 1:26-27).
  • Homosexuality is a manifestation of fallen nature and it violates created intent (Leviticus 18:22; 20:13; 1 Corinthians 6:9-10).
  • Homosexuals, like all people, are redeemable and change is possible (1 Corinthians 6:11).

The crisis we have faced and continue to face is being seen only as an “issue” by far too many with the eternal destination of many being neglected, if not consciously dismissed.

May God have mercy upon us (1 Corinthians 6:9-11).

Thankfully and gratefully, God still has His remnant that understands and proclaims, “silence implies consent and truthless grace accomplishes nothing.”

When God speaks a word on any topic He speaks the final word.

Pastor Phillip Lee
Executive Director
His Way Out Ministries

His Way Out has been faithfully ministering to men and women seeking a way out of sexually broken lifestyles since 1994. We could not do it without the support of Christians like you. Every dollar that you give to His Way Out Ministries helps to further this vital ministry. Won’t you take a minute to prayerfully consider a monthly donation to His Way Out? Please consider making a one-time donation or set up a secure monthly PayPal contribution on our donation page at https://www.hiswayout.com/donate/. Thank you, Pastor Phillip Lee

The alleged Utopia of ‘gay’ has been, is now and shall remain an illusion, a contradiction and a false concept when viewed through the lens of reality. I and many other men and women had to learn this truth the hard way.

Honesty requires I acknowledge that change from homosexuality is by no means easy. For most it is a long and difficult process, requiring a deep commitment and strong motivation, coupled by wise counsel and support. But the very same things can be said of many and various other behavioral problems, from alcoholism to physical abuse to drug addiction.

From time to time, I have been conversing with a Christian on the subject of homosexuality to have them make this statement, “This whole ‘gay thing’ is a lost cause.” I have a response to this tragic statement with no delicate way in which to clothe my response. For any faithful follower of Christ Jesus to say the present crisis of homosexuality is a lost cause is the same as saying “the devil is more powerful than God.”

Homosexual orientation is just one of the many manifestations of man’s fallen nature which in theological terms is known as “sin.” With same-sex attraction being no respecter of persons, it is out of this Scriptural truth and fact that the apostle Paul declared, “all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God,” (Romans 3:23) and also defines the various forms such sin can take:

“Do you not know that the wicked will not inherit the kingdom of God? Do not be deceived: Neither the sexually immoral nor idolaters nor adulterers nor male prostitutes nor homosexual offenders nor thieves nor the greedy nor drunkards nor slanderers nor swindlers will inherit the kingdom of God” (1 Corinthians 6:9-10).

Homosexuality is, clearly, only one of the various types of behavior that are condemned in the Bible, and it is condemned for the same reason as the rest – it is an affront to the character of God. It is critically important to emphasize that the condemnation of homosexual practice is to warn and ultimately rescue those caught by the snare of same-sex attraction.

Many men and women know what it means to be rescued from the brokenness of same-sex attraction and not evidenced solely by their powerful testimony but by this important Scriptural truth:

“And this is what some of you used to be. But you were washed, you were sanctified, you were justified in the name of the Lord Jesus Christ and in the Spirit of our God” (1 Corinthians 6:11).

Personally, I find it nothing short of remarkable that some today struggle at believing and embracing the ultimate redemptive purposes of God are the same today as they have always been:

“Indeed, God did not send the Son into the world to condemn the world, but in order that the world might be saved through Him. Those who believe in Him are not condemned; but those who do not believe are condemned already, because they have not believed in the name of the only Son of God” (John 3:17-19).

Jesus and the writers of Scripture did not hesitate to condemn sin and immorality in whatever form they found it. They did so to liberate men and women from the grip of spiritual and behavioral bondage. Therefore, I submit our ultimate goal as Ambassadors for Christ is not merely to show that the biblical judgment against homosexuality is certainly well-founded but rather to avail ourselves as instruments of both truth and grace that God may accomplish His redemptive purposes.

I believe the traditional Christian position should be to understand and accept (accept does not mean to approve) the homosexuals’ orientation as a condition but also see homosexual orientation as a temporary, not a permanent, condition. To condemn the homosexual for his or her orientation is unchristian.

Every faithful follower of Christ Jesus should be appalled when we see Christians respond to homosexuals with hate and loathing. That said, the acting out of same-sex attraction is sinful, just as it is wrong for heterosexuals to engage in sexual activity outside of marriage.

It is God’s love and the truth of Scripture that seeks to separate sinners from sin. When Scripture speaks a clear word on any given topic, it speaks the final word. I pray we all would stop trying to explain why God has spoken in the way He has; the essential issue is what He has spoken.

As Christians, meaning we accept the Bible in its entirety or not at all, are we still convinced that there is ample evidence, which is available to anyone with openness to the facts, there is an option to our sinful nature and the consequences that flow from it?

God’s love and His truth still seek nothing higher than the welfare of all people – all people.

Pastor Phillip Lee
Executive Director
His Way Out Ministries

His Way Out has been faithfully ministering to men and women seeking a way out of sexually broken lifestyles since 1994. We could not do it without the support of Christians like you. Every dollar that you give to His Way Out Ministries helps to further this vital ministry. Won’t you take a minute to prayerfully consider a monthly donation to His Way Out? Please consider making a one-time donation or set up a secure monthly PayPal contribution on our donation page at https://www.hiswayout.com/donate/. Thank you, Pastor Phillip Lee

Respectfully, truth, God’s truth does not change just because you did.

• You told me I needed to surrender my life to Christ Jesus and be born-again. I surrendered.

• You told me I needed to forsake and repent of homosexual practice. I repented. I turned away.

• You told me my mind needed renewing and I needed a life transformation. I willing died to self.

• You told me I needed to forsake the gay community and embrace the Church as my new family. I did so by faith.

• You regularly encouraged me to share my testimony. I gladly did so to honor Christ Jesus.

• You continue to remind me the Church is God’s vehicle to reach the wounded, broken and hurting. I agree.

• You told me the Bible is the textbook for life in all matters of faith and practice. I embraced this truth.

• You reminded me over and over again “Jesus remains the same yesterday, today and forever.” (Hebrews 13:8) Indeed and Amen.

But now, some of you are saying, per your new stance that your understanding of homosexuality has “evolved” – “Well, maybe homosexuality isn’t so bad after all.”

Many Sunday morning church pulpits have lapsed fully into the silent mode with regard to homosexuality which has and is perpetuating a tsunami of immorality.

The gay community is extremely vocal and highly visible demanding their right to be who they want to be, but I am now being told daily I cannot have, and I must now have the same right.

I am trying very, very hard to understand. Would you help me, please?

Much too often, I turn around wondering, “Where did everybody go?”

Having once faced and addressed the impact of rejection and abandonment in my life, must I face it again?

Should we compare where we stand now regarding homosexuality and related issues to the time when things got very, very tough and Jesus said to His disciples, “Will you also turn away?” (John 6:67)
You told me and reminded me frequently…

“The Church must call homosexual practice sin and while that will be offensive too many, the Word of God must not and cannot be watered down.”

In many respects, I attribute my new life in Christ Jesus of 39 years to Christians sharing and holding me to The Truth.

• You told me I was not born gay. I embraced this truth.

• You told me change is possible. I changed.

• You told me our true identity is in Christ Jesus – not our sexuality. True.

• You told me not to allow my past to dictate who I am in Christ today. Agreed.

• You told me homosexuals are redeemable with God’s grace and power more than sufficient to transform a life. Amen.

• You told me sharing the Gospel is not an option for a Christian but rather obedience to a command. Absolutely.

• You told me the only way out of homosexuality was through a deep, personal, intimate relationship with Christ Jesus.

Has any of the above mentioned changed?

If, yes, to any of the above mentioned, “Jesus I know, and Paul I know, but who are you?” (Acts 19:15)
Truth lived out Christ’s way, does not have any gray edges. It is abundantly clear and straight forward.

In Christ,

Phillip, just one of the many prodigals.

“And we, who with unveiled faces all reflect the Lord’s glory, are being transformed into His likeness with ever-increasing glory, which comes from the Lord, who is the Spirit.” (2 Corinthians 3:18)

When you and I became a Christian, we began a transformation process not just of what we disapprove, but also of how we disapprove.

The disapproval of any particular behavior including same-sex practice(s) does not particularly identify one as Christian.

Being a Christian is far more profound than changing and voicing what we disapprove of.

The Apostle Paul said, “I am debtor both to the Greeks, and to the barbarians” (Romans 1:14).

There is no doubt Paul understood and lived his life as a debtor to “everyone” on the face of the earth because of the Gospel of Jesus.

Do we, as Ambassadors for Christ, realize that same debtedness to every unsaved soul which includes the vast, enormous and virtually untouched mission field called “the gay community?”

Yes, the Bible is clear that homosexual practice is against God’s pattern for humankind, which should be all the more reason to be the bearer of good tidings to those with unwanted same-gender attraction and not just announce that a certain lifestyle is sinful.

Look beyond the “gay” or “lesbian” label to the whole person inside and share the transforming power of God’s love and forgiveness without compromising the truth.

Be purposed in joining the remnant by offering the message that many are trying to silence today…

There is freedom from homosexuality through the unconditional love and grace of Jesus Christ.

Pastor Phillip Lee
Executive Director
His Way Out Ministries

His Way Out has been faithfully ministering to men and women seeking a way out of sexually broken lifestyles since 1994. We could not do it without the support of Christians like you. Every dollar that you give to His Way Out Ministries helps to further this vital ministry. Won’t you take a minute to prayerfully consider a monthly donation to His Way Out? Please consider making a one-time donation or set up a secure monthly PayPal contribution on our donation page at https://www.hiswayout.com/donate/. Thank you, Pastor Phillip Lee

With at least 1,000 men expected in attendance per session, I am greatly looking forward to speaking and teaching at the “Stand for Righteousness” Men’s Ministry Conference in Trinidad and Tobago, June 14-17, 2024.

“I beseech you therefore, brethren, by the mercies of God, that you present your bodies a living sacrifice, holy, acceptable to God, which is your reasonable service.” (Romans 12:1)

Of all the challenges that we face as the Church in today’s society, sexuality is undoubtedly one of the greatest. If as Christ-followers, being fully and unconditionally committed to the entire Word of God and valuing our call to be the salt and light of society, then we must come to terms with the rapidly changing sexual scene around us. Make no mistake – the scene is an alarming one.

During my 2-Hour Educational Workshop titled “Demystifying Homosexuality: Defending Biblical Sexual Morality” the evening of June 17, 2024, we will turn our attention to: Understanding Homosexuality, The Myths of Homosexuality, Reaching Gay Youth, Counterfeit Sexuality and Homosexuality and the Church.

“But you are a chosen people, a royal priesthood, a holy nation, a people belonging to God, that you may declare the praises of Him who called you out of darkness into His marvelous light.” (1 Peter 2:9)

Walking in faith isn’t about fighting culture wars but witnessing Jesus’ restorative grace to those who haven’t yet found it.

Eternal lives matter.

People change slowly, so give yourself time to change. No one attains a stable Christian life in a week or a month, so don’t throw in the towel and give up after six months, thinking that God has forsaken you, and that it is useless to keep on trying. Be patient, and you will eventually see God’s character developing in your life.

Begin by thinking of yourself Biblically because for the majority of us our concept of ourselves seldom comes from the Bible. Mostly, we pick up our idea of self-worth from people around us, and this image is usually false.

Learn to think of yourself according to the description God outlines in His Word.

For far too many, sexual feelings and desires have been viewed as an unfortunate part of their being that keeps them defeated in their Christian walk. Given we are all born into a fallen world and we all struggle with a sinful nature, our sexual longings and desires have become distorted. However, they remain a wonderful part of who we are as human beings.

So, how do we as Christian men and women control our sexual behavior? Especially, since we all bare the marks of the fallen age in which we live to some degree or another. Is it really possible to bring every thought captive (2 Corinthians 10:5)? Is it really possible to stop impure thoughts? How do we find purity in our sexual desires when we have indulged in pornography, sex before marriage, homosexuality, or adultery?

All Christians have to deal with inappropriate sexual feelings and attractions. Those combating same-gender attraction (homosexuality) are not unique and as a result do not belong in a different subclass than the rest of Christians struggling with the long list of heterosexual sexual addictions. Sexual struggles are a very real part of being human! Thankfully, “We do not have a high priest (Jesus) who is unable to sympathize with our weaknesses, but we have One who has been tempted in every way just as we are – yet without sin.” (Hebrews 4:15)

Each and every time we are tempted, the process always begins with some type of outside stimulation, which we ultimately choose to embrace or reject. If we embrace “the thought,” and begin to build upon it, to fantasize, the end result is indulgence. While I am convinced that none of us will ever be able to completely avoid being stimulated, we need not progress to the point of practice. Maybe, just maybe, if we all would embrace the truth that being stimulated is completely and totally unavoidable, our lives would not remain in a constant state of frustration, and the huge amounts of condemnation and disgust that we place upon ourselves would be extremely minimized or even possibly eradicated enabling each of us to climb out from underneath the “shame factor.”

James 1:14-15 tells us, “But each one is tempted when, by his own evil desire, he is dragged away and enticed. Then, after desire has conceived, it gives birth to sin.” Clearly, a homosexual thought (desire) or an inappropriate heterosexual, lustful contemplation that occurs in our mind can either be embraced or killed. We choose whether or not any inappropriate thought regarding sexual lust or temptation will be allowed to progress passed lust to sin.

I remain convinced that being successful in overcoming homosexuality or any heterosexual sexual addiction, largely depends on what happens in our mind. Our thought life is the battlefield where victory is either won or lost. Clearly, to break with any mindset or actions of inappropriate sexual expression, requires changing our thinking. Unless our thought patterns change, we will be continually defeated and discouraged in the process of recovery or becoming whole in our sexuality.

A huge component in dealing with sexual brokenness, homosexual and heterosexual, is coming to terms with our past. Philippians 3:13-14 tells us, “Forgetting those things which are behind, and reaching forth unto those things which are before, I press toward the mark for the high calling of God in Christ Jesus.” The lies of our past must be replaced with the truth of God’s Word. It is through God’s Word we discover the reality of God’s love for us as individuals and His desire to forgive us for all sin – including all forms of sexual and relational brokenness. When acted upon, the Bible’s perspective on human sexuality will profoundly change the way we see our past and certainly help us navigate the future.

Ultimately, we must embrace that it is God’s Word and not our feelings that determines truth. Yes, God loves each and every one of us that struggles with aspects of human sexuality. “But God demonstrates His own love for us in this: While we still were sinners, Christ died for us.” (Romans 5:8) When we repent – meaning we have rejected the behavior – Jesus cleanses us from all homosexual sin, lustful heterosexual thoughts and sexual encounters.

Zig Ziglar once said, “We are where we are and what we are because of what has gone into our minds. We change where we are and what we are by changing what goes into our minds.”

Unfortunately, one of the chief obstacles to healing, wholeness and restoration from sexual sin is the obsession with the immediate. The “itch” for the instantaneous pervades much of Christian thinking. Many tend to think that unless a restoration or deliverance is immediate, it is not of God. Most definitely, we have become impatient and frustrated with things that take time. Isn’t it amazing how people will go to huge amounts of trouble to learn French, or physics or scuba diving? They have the patience to learn how to operate a car but they won’t be bothered learning how to operate themselves. It has been said, “He that would get weeds destroyed must plan the ground with contrary seeds.” Indeed, we cannot walk in God’s ways unless He teaches us, but it is deception to ask Him to teach us unless we resolve to obey Him as He instructs us.

Many, many times I have communicated that every follower of Christ Jesus is in process of becoming more like our Redeemer. Recently, it occurred to me that maybe, just maybe God is more interested in the process than the end result. If I can remain determined, calm, and trusting God the Father in the very midst of so many questions and unresolved matters, couldn’t the process be just as honoring and glorifying to God as the end result?

Pastor Phillip Lee
Executive Director
His Way Out Ministries

Please consider making a donation at www.hiswayout.com/donate. Thank you, Pastor Phillip Lee

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